I. WAS. WRONG. {Repost in honor of National Foster Care Month}

This post was originally published on November 16, 2012.

It is BY FAR the most popular post and the most prayed over post I have ever written.

Coincidence?

I think not.

Our foster care social worker makes a visit to our house once a month to see how we are doing as a foster home. She is assigned to look after us; the boys and their mother have another worker assigned to look after them and work towards the goal of reunification.

Our worker, we’ll call her “Susan”, was here last week and we were talking about how understaffed the department is. SO understaffed, she almost called us about a baby. A baby with a “concurrent” goal. (For those of you not in the foster care world, the term “concurrent” means they are working towards adoption for this baby.) Did I mention we're talking about a BABY?

Susan knows we are not in the place to adopt a baby. Susan knows we have our "hands full". Susan knows we have a little boy in the Congo coming home soon-ish. But she had no one else to call. “All of our homes are full.” she told me. “We don’t have enough homes – even for babies.”

Do those words stop you in your tracks? Not enough homes? For babies? In Kentucky?

Say What!?!

William and I never intended to become foster parents. We never even considered adopting domestically. The thought literally never crossed our minds.

Do you ever speak words that come back to haunt you? I did once. Ok, a few times, but at least once on this very topic.

The day before "T" and "M" came to live with us I attended Created for Care, a retreat/conference for adoptive moms. I was speaking with a woman whose family had been praying about starting the journey of adopting from Ethiopia. She asked me a question I could tell had been on her mind for some time. She asked me how I answer people who want to know why we are adopting from Africa and not “here”. Here being in the US.

I gave my wise Christian answer (insert sarcasm here) - we prayed about it and feel like God has our children in Africa... and then I told her the need is greater there. Kids in the US have roofs over their heads, clothes on their backs and food in their tummies. Their parents are not dying of AIDS at alarming rates and they are not dying themselves of dirty water. Simple. The need is greater. I. Spoke. Those. Words.

Friends, I was wrong. Hear me. I. WAS. WRONG.

While yes, children in Africa (or Russia or India or Haiti) are more likely to be on the streets in the only shirt they own begging for food and living in a cardboard box because their parents are dead or sick, the effect parentlessness has on them is NO GREATER than the effect of parentlessness on vulnerable children right “here”.

Dr. Purvis says “their brains are different”. Kids from "hard places" - their brains are different. The reason their brains are different is because of the lack of nurturing they received prenatally and during the first few years of their lives.

Their brains are different because no one nurtured them.

No one met their needs.

No one loved them.

There are six risk factors that put a child into this category: difficult pregnancy, difficult birth, early hospitalization, abuse, neglect and trauma. (Certainly malnutrition plays a critical role and can have dramatic affects on development but a child who was hungry and nurtured will be better off than a child who had a full belly but no nurture.)

When T and M came to live with us I was SHOCKED to see the exact same behaviors we had read about and come to expect from our little one coming to us from an orphanage in a third world country. In my naive mind they would be "normal". They had a roof, clothes and food. (most of the time) They even had a parent. I thought they would be a little shaken up but fair pretty well.

I was wrong.

Their brains are different BUT their needs are the same. The same as children in Africa. Children in Russia, India and Haiti. The need for lovers of Jesus to fight for them is the same.

When we went through foster care training over the summer our instructor shared statistics that were startling to me at the time. I just didn't know:

246 kids in foster care ages 0 - 5

118 kids in care ages 6 - 11

344 kids in care ages 12 - 18

50 kids in care ages 19 - 21 (this number may be the saddest as these kids are holding out to the very last minute for a family to call their own)

Nearly 800 kids are in foster homes in Jefferson County. 800 kids. Ironically, in the state of Kentucky there are 800 KIDS READY TO BE ADOPTED. Did you know that? Six months ago, I did not.

There are a lot of myths regarding foster care and adopting from the foster system. Unfortunately, the only stories that receive media attention are ones where a birth parent shows up years later and demands their kid back. Or stories of kids who linger in the states care for years and years. While these things do happen, they are not the norm in Kentucky. More importantly, the system may be broken, but God is sovereign.

No one reading these words is immune from receiving a phone call today that will change their life. Your life. My life. We are not in control. Of anything. Biological kids, internationally adopted kids, foster kids.They all belong to Him.

Did you know...

Did you know adopting from foster care is essentially free? FREE.

Did you know biological parents have no way of gaining back custody of their children once parental rights are terminated? NO. WAY.

Did you know children enter foster care through no fault of their own? They are victims of the adults who were supposed to take care of them.

Did you know in the state of Kentucky the Safe Families for Children Act prevents kids from lingering in the system?

Did you know you are provided a per diem to care for the foster kids in your home? Did you know this per diem continues for most children even after they have been adopted? Did you know kids from foster care can go to any state college for free?

Did you know you can take your foster kids across state lines, enroll them in daycare and have babysitters?

Did you know you will get attached?

And it will be hard?

It will.

In the paraphrased words of Amy Monroe "You can handle getting attached and getting hurt. You're an adult. You can handle it. They are kids."

These kids you are afraid of loving too much - they are dying for someone to love them like that. While they are not dying from poverty, disease or hunger, their needs are the same.

If you'd like to learn more about adopting from foster care in KY visit the KY Department for Family Services. If you are interested in foster care or adoption in another state visit Focus on the Family.

My prayer is that this post would shine a light on the needs of children right "here". Please contact me if you have questions about our experience or if I can help you prayerfully begin the journey of foster care. lindsy.wallace AT gmail DOT com

 

a glimpse of Jesus...

"To love is to risk. Opening your home to a foster kid will be emotionally difficult. It's inconvenient. It's hard. It's messy. It's exhausting. I guarantee it.

But all too often, selfishness keeps us from taking care of these children. Somewhere along the way, in our concern for an easy, happy, comfortable life, we may be missing the heart of the gospel - to seek and save the lost, to reach out to the forgotten and the oppressed, to love sacrificially, and to pour our lives out so that others can catch a glimpse of Jesus.

If the only reason we refuse to get involved in foster care is because "it is too hard emotionally" or "we can't handle saying goodbye." we may need to repent of self-absorption. We must ask ourselves the question: Do we truly love our neighbor as we love ourselves? What if a foster child is the "neighbor" that God has brought into our path to love?"

~ Johnny Carr, Orphan Justice 

Nothing is Wasted {National Foster Care Month ::: Guest Post}

Today's post comes from my friend Lauren Caseper at Traded Dreams. Lauren and her husband John are former foster parents and while their foster story is a difficult one, I'm honored to share her heart with you today.

 

Our experience with foster care seems like such a whirlwind in retrospect. We applied to our local social services department and then only two months later there came a call from our case worker. With just two hours notice there they were – twin two year old boys sitting in our living room. In the blink of an eye we became parents to two very neglected little boys at the height of toddlerdom. They were with us for three months and then just as quickly as they blew into our lives they blew back out… but never out of our hearts.

 

The twins were one of life’s greatest surprises, yet greatest blessings. It was a hard transition for everyone. I remember their tears and our tears vividly. I had no idea how to be a mother, let alone to children with such great trauma in their lives. But one thing I did know how to do was love –so that’s where we started and that’s where we remained. In love.

 

One hug at a time I healed little hurts. Each day started with hugs and kisses. Tears were wiped away, boo-boos were mended, tummies were filled, books were read, dandelions were blown, cars were raced, baths were enjoyed, and there was more play time, giggles, snuggles, wrestling, and outside adventures than they had ever experienced in their lives. The days ended with evening walks, songs sung in their room, prayers prayed, and one last “hud and tiss.”

 

As the weeks passed by we settled into family life and it seemed they had been there all along. Loving them began to heal some of the broken places inside my heart, and loving them began to heal some of the broken places inside their hearts. The bruises had faded away and the faces were filling out. Cheeks were becoming rosey and the sunken look had left their eyes. There was joy, peace, and always love.

 

Through a series of grievous errors the boys were ordered to return to their home after only living with us for three months. I sat shocked on the other end of that phone call and I have struggled every day to forgive that judge. We only had a couple hours to pack their little backpacks full of their toys, clothes, and books. Then the social services van pulled up and we wept in the front yard as they took our boys away. We never saw them again.

 

For a long time I wondered what the point of it all was. My heart felt as if it were literally being ripped from my chest. Their situation wasn’t made better. I knew the place they were returned to and I knew it wasn’t safe. I knew they would be hungry and I knew they were hurting… but here I was with empty arms and completely unable to do anything for them. What on earth was the point of those three months?

 

Slowly God began to remind me that nothing is wasted. Even if nothing changes in those boys home life they had three months of love. They had three months of learning what it means to be a family. They heard the name of Jesus every single day for three months. They have two people who will carry them in their hearts for all of eternity… two people who will never cease praying for them. Foster care stories don’t always have happy endings… ours didn’t. But that doesn’t mean that it isn’t worth it.

 

When we buckled the twins into the van that last day he looked up at me with innocent green eyes and said, “Don’t worry mama – Jesus with me when I go bye bye in car.” And he is with them today. I cling to that and the hope of a heavenly reunion. Nothing is wasted. It’s all worth it.

 

 

FAQ's (National Foster Care Month)

///DISCLAIMER: I am not a foster care expert. I have been in this game for a whopping seven months. These answers are based on our experience in Kentucky. If you'd like to learn more about foster care in KY visit the KY Department for Family Services. If you are interested in foster care in another state visit Focus on the Family.///

 

 

 

 

Who can become foster parents? Adults over 21, married couples and singles.

 

How much training in required? The State of KY requires 30 hours of initial training and 6 hours each year as continuing education.

 

Why are kids in foster care? What did they do? Children enter foster care through no fault of their own. They are victims of neglect of abuse from the adults who were supposed to take care of them.

 

Will I have to have contact with their birth parents? Most likely no; although is will depend on the situation. In some cases, it is not safe for the birth family to know where their child is. In others, contact is appropriate and beneficial for the children and the birth parent. Your social worker will determine this with you.

 

Can you request certain ages/genders/number of children? Yes, your social worker who completes your home study will work with your family on the best fit for your home and current family members.

 

Are only older kids available to foster/adopt? NO! Every month when our worker visits she shares with me how there are not enough homes for babies. Babies in KY have no home to go out of the hospital to!

 

Do foster parents pay for the expenses for the kids? Foster parents are provided a per Diem to care for the foster kids in your home. In MOST cases, this per Diem continues after the child has been adopted. Health care is also provided for the child and in KY, kids from foster care can go to any state college for free!

Can I take my foster child across state lines, enroll them in daycare and have babysitters? Yes. In some cases biological parents and/or state supervisors will need to approve travel. Daycare centers and babysitters have to be approved by the state but the process if (fairly) pain free.

 

How much does it cost to adopt from foster care? It is essentially FREE. There are attorney costs but the state will reimburse you for the majority of these fees.

 

Can biological parents gain back custody of their kids? No. Once parental rights are terminated, biological parents cannot gain them back.

Will it be hard? Will I get attached? Yes and Yes. In the paraphrased words of Amy Monroe "You can handle getting attached and getting hurt. You're an adult. You can handle it. They are kids."

 

What did I miss? Please ask away in the comments section or send me an email! 

 

The Need is Real {National Foster Care Month}

May is National Foster Care Month!

You may be asking yourself, "Why do we need National Foster Care Month?"

I'm SO glad you asked!

We need it for two reasons. Because the need is REAL and because the command is CLEAR.

Let's start with the Need.

In the United States there are over 400,500 children in the foster care system.
In Kentucky there are over 7,000 children in foster homes.
In Jefferson County (Louisville, KY) there are over 800 children in foster homes.

Later this month we'll talk about WHO those children are but right now, feel the weight of these numbers.

Stop. Feel it. Because they are not just numbers. They are children.

Think about 400,500 children going to bed tonight in our country without their parents. Kids in your state. In your town. In your neighborhood. The need is REAL.

And the command is CLEAR.

Remember what Jesus said about children?  “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.”

Scripture is FULL of passages about orphans and the poor. I think we can agree anytime scripture talks about the poor, orphans are included. 

 

You shall not mistreat any widow or fatherless child.

If you do mistreat them, and they cry out to me,

I will surely hear their cry,

Exodus 22:22 - 23

 

O Lord, you hear the desire of the afflicted;
you will strengthen their heart; you will incline your ear
to do justice to the fatherless and the oppressed,
so that man who is of the earth may strike terror no more.

Psalm 10:17 - 18

 

Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this:

to visit orphans and widows in their affliction,

and to keep oneself unstained from the world.

James 1:27

 

Father of the fatherless and protector of widows
is God in his holy habitation.
God settles the solitary in a home;
he leads out the prisoners to prosperity,
but the rebellious dwell in a parched land.

Psalm 68:5 - 6

 

 “When you reap your harvest in your field and forget a sheaf in the field,

you shall not go back to get it.

It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow,

that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands.

Deuteronomy 24:19

 

learn to do good;
seek justice,
correct oppression;
bring justice to the fatherless,
plead the widow's cause.

Isaiah 1:17

 

Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me

Matthew 18:5

 

And the King will answer them,

‘Truly, I say to you,

as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers,

you did it to me.’

Matthew 25:40

 

I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.

John 14:18

 

Open your mouth for the mute,
for the rights of all who are destitute.

Open your mouth, judge righteously,
defend the rights of the poor and needy.

Proverbs 31:8 - 9

 

 

These are God's holy words to us, his hands and feet, when it comes to caring for the orphaned, the widowed, the poor and the destitute. To paraphrase our pastor's Orphan Sunday message, at some point, the gospel has to compel us to practically DO SOMETHING.

 

 

The state's job is to protect children but the state cannot and does not nurture children and point them to the only One who can heal him. His bride must do that. If not us, then who?

 

 

I'm excited (and a bit overwhelmed!) about the posts I have planned for this month! Follow along to learn more about the American orphan crisis and hear other foster parents, former foster kids, social workers and more share their experiences with foster care!

 

 

If you are new around here check out this post where I share how I WAS WRONG about American orphans and foster care.

Dear Me (an open letter to my pre-four-kids-under-the-age-of-five self)

Dear pre-four-kids-under-the-age-of-five-self,

You are about to go from two to four kids overnight. It will be fun and exciting and crazy. It will earn you interesting looks and comments like "did you bring your daycare kids to the zoo?" when you dare go out in public.

Here are some things it would have been handy to know ahead of time: 


First, write down everything they say. Examples to follow.

I know you're one of those crunchy green mamas - Get.Over. It. Buy napkins. The paper kind you don't have to wash. Same things goes for paper plates. And clorox wipes. This too shall pass.

Speaking of clorox wipes, keep them near the toilet. The one that will be used by three preschool boys approximately 536 times per day. Aim much?

Your double BOB is worth it's weight in gold. You'll be pushing four kids weighing a total of about 150 pounds. Someone will have to pry it from your cold dead hands.

Parenting someone else's kids is hard. Really hard. I got nothing to say to make that any easier. Just know it.

March 29, 2012 - T told Moses he didn't like him. Moses responded "Yes you do. I do lots of cool things!"

Run your dishwasher every night. Even when it is not full. I know, it makes your earth mama skin crawl. Just do it. Trust me. Waking up to dirty dishes is not a fun way to start the day.

Hand sanitizer is your friend. Washing and drying eight little hands is more work than it sounds. Buy a bunch and put one in every bag.

Baby wipes? Also your friend. Use them. On their faces and hands and anywhere else you might wipe.

Let some things go. For example, it's great to have a separate basket for each type of toy. But that ain't reality. Making beds? Let it go.

"My feet hurt because I ate yogurt and grapes and that makes my feet hurt." I have no idea what kid said that but I wrote it down, May 5, 2012

Stainless steel water bottles at every meal. Cups have to be washed. Water bottles? Not so much. If they start growing something looking oddly similar to black mold - wash them. I hear that happens.

Melatonin is your friend. Some people will poo-poo it. Those people have kids who sleep.

Pick your battles. Shirt on backwards? Who cares.

"When the sun come ups can we go to Halloween?" T, May 14, 2012

Take notes. Even if all you do is send yourself a coded email before collapsing into bed. When you can look back and see that bedtime use to take three and a half hours and now only takes one, you'll be glad you did.

Go to bed. Pinterest and Facebook may feel good now but you will regret it in the morning.

Get up before the little people do. Wake up for them not to them. This is easier said than done. Try to do it and give yourself grace when it doesn't happen.

Amazon Prime is your friend. Running out for a quick trip to Target ain't what it use to be. It now involves wondering if someone is going to call the police on the crazy lady, ahem you, "holding" the kicking screaming kid in the bathroom.

Have fun. Dance parties. Cupcakes for breakfast. Tents in the living room. Fun. Is. Good.

Keep the kids out of the bedroom. No kid toys, no kid clothes, no kid paraphernalia in the bedroom. Adult bedrooms are for one thing. Making kids.

Accept help. Yes you want meals brought over. Yes you need someone to pick something up while they are out. Yes you need those hand-me-down clothes. If no one offers, ask. Some folks just don't know how hard it is.

"Moses your feet are hairy. Like Esau's. And Mr. Williams." T, summer 2012

Don't be a slave to appointments. The therapists, doctors, social workers and judges (ok, maybe not the judges) are not in control of your life. Schedule the appointment when it makes the most sense for your crew, not when they have an opening.

Never ever ever forgo date night. There will be weeks when you live for it and it will be the only day of the week you shower and speak to an adult. The kid may cry while you are gone but you come back a much happier version of the burned out mama you were when you left. It's worth it.

Simplify the stuff. Kids from hard places are easily overstimulated. Cut the toys in half. Get rid of anything broken, missing pieces or with dead batteries.

Most everything you read in the books and learned in the classes is true. It will happen in your living room. Don't be so surprised. Take a deep breath, pray and do what you know to do. Then get yo'self a therapist girl. For you.

Find someone who gets it. You will need someone to laugh and cry with.Someone to drop meals on your porch and bring you kombucha. Someone to pray for your kids and help you google all the crazy things they do.

Last, love those kids with everything you've got. Life is short, these little years are much shorter. You are not promised tomorrow, focus on today.

Mama-of-four-kids-under-the-age-of-five,

linking up today with Lauren Casper at Traded Dreams

Weekend Reading

I'm emerging from slacker mode. Here you go... thank me later.

I came across this great blog - written by a foster mom, with several young kiddos, who also runs a foster care ministry. YES. PLEASE. I promise you will be encouraged by her family.

Did you see this uh-mazing ultimate list of adoption fundraisers? Check it out. There are sure to be some new ideas among these gems. (And we might be included in the "Other Creative Ideas" section:-)

This post on special needs parenting made me let out a sigh of relief. More to come on why, but this is a necessary read for anyone with a kiddo who has special needs and anyone with friends who are parenting kids with special needs. 

I'm leaving you with a quote from Gillian's above linked post...

If you are struggling with your child who has special needs, I give you permission to say it outloud.

I give you permission to ask for help.

I give you permission to realize and own the fact that Jesus is with you in your pain. He knows how much you love and cherish your child, and he also knows that this path can be difficult.

When I open up about my struggles something amazing happens.

I cry “uncle,” and God whispers “peace.” “Gillian, what took you so long to give this to me?”
I call for help, and Jesus stands up on my behalf. “I’m here. I’m helping.”
I confess weakness, and He claims strength. “Oh, child, finally, you are starting to get it.”

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

weekend reading (where have you been?)

I've been seriously slacking when it comes to posting "weekend reading" on Saturdays...

I'm digging my way out of slacker mode but, in the mean time, check out the trailer for Faultless: The American Orphan, a full-length documentary, developed by Unthinkable and the Christian Alliance for Orphans for the purpose of inspiring and equipping Christ’s followers to more deeply love and care for orphans for the glory of God.


 

I Was Wrong

Our foster care social worker makes a visit to our house once a month to see how we are doing as a foster home. She is assigned to look after us; the boys and their mother have another worker assigned to look after them and work towards the goal of reunification.

Our worker, we’ll call her “Susan”, was here last week and we were talking about how understaffed the department is. SO understaffed, she almost called us about a baby. A baby with a “concurrent” goal. (For those of you not in the foster care world, the term “concurrent” means they are working towards adoption for this baby.) Did I mention we're talking about a BABY?

Susan knows we are not in the place to adopt a baby. Susan knows we have our "hands full". Susan knows we have a little boy in the Congo coming home soon-ish. But she had no one else to call. “All of our homes are full.” she told me. “We don’t have enough homes – even for babies.”

Do those words stop you in your tracks? Not enough homes? For babies? In Kentucky?

Say What!?!

William and I never intended to become foster parents. We never even considered adopting domestically. The thought literally never crossed our minds.

Do you ever speak words that come back to haunt you? I did once. Ok, a few times, but at least once on this very topic.

The day before "T" and "M" came to live with us I attended Created for Care, a retreat/conference for adoptive moms. I was speaking with a woman whose family had been praying about starting the journey of adopting from Ethiopia. She asked me a question I could tell had been on her mind for some time. She asked me how I answer people who want to know why we are adopting from Africa and not “here”. Here being in the US.

I gave my wise Christian answer (insert sarcasm here) - we prayed about it and feel like God has our children in Africa... and then I told her the need is greater there. Kids in the US have roofs over their heads, clothes on their backs and food in their tummies. Their parents are not dying of AIDS at alarming rates and they are not dying themselves of dirty water. Simple. The need is greater. I. Spoke. Those. Words.

Friends, I was wrong. Hear me. I. WAS. WRONG.

While yes, children in Africa (or Russia or India or Haiti) are more likely to be on the streets in the only shirt they own begging for food and living in a cardboard box because their parents are dead or sick, the effect parentlessness has on them is NO GREATER than the effect of parentlessness on vulnerable children right “here”.

Dr. Purvis says “their brains are different”. Kids from "hard places" - their brains are different. The reason their brains are different is because of the lack of nurturing they received prenatally and during the first few years of their lives.

Their brains are different because no one nurtured them. 

No one met their needs. 

No one loved them.

There are six risk factors that put a child into this category: difficult pregnancy, difficult birth, early hospitalization, abuse, neglect and trauma. (Certainly malnutrition plays a critical role and can have dramatic affects on development but a child who was hungry and nurtured will be better off than a child who had a full belly but no nurture.)

When T and M came to live with us I was SHOCKED to see the exact same behaviors we had read about and come to expect from our little one coming to us from an orphanage in a third world country. In my naive mind they would be "normal". They had a roof, clothes and food. (most of the time) They even had a parent. I thought they would be a little shaken up but fair pretty well.

I was wrong.

Their brains are different BUT their needs are the same. The same as children in Africa. Children in Russia, India and Haiti. The need for lovers of Jesus to fight for them is the same.

When we went through foster care training over the summer our instructor shared statistics that were startling to me at the time. I just didn't know:

246 kids in foster care ages 0 - 5

118 kids in care ages 6 - 11

344 kids in care ages 12 - 18

50 kids in care ages 19 - 21 (this number may be the saddest as these kids are holding out to the very last minute for a family to call their own)

Nearly 800 kids are in foster homes in Jefferson County.  800 kids. Ironically, in the state of Kentucky there are 800 KIDS READY TO BE ADOPTED. Did you know that? Six months ago, I did not.

There are a lot of myths regarding foster care and adopting from the foster system. Unfortunately, the only stories that receive media attention are ones where a birth parent shows up years later and demands their kid back. Or stories of kids who linger in the states care for years and years. While these things do happen, they are not the norm in Kentucky. More importantly, the system may be broken, but God is sovereign. 

No one reading these words is immune from receiving a phone call today that will change their life. Your life. My life. We are not in control. Of anything. Biological kids, internationally adopted kids, foster kids.They all belong to Him.

Did you know...

Did you know adopting from foster care is essentially free? FREE.

Did you know biological parents have no way of gaining back custody of their children once parental rights are terminated? NO. WAY.

Did you know children enter foster care through no fault of their own? They are victims of the adults who were supposed to take care of them.

Did you know in the state of Kentucky the Safe Families for Children Act prevents kids from lingering in the system?

Did you know you are provided a per diem to care for the foster kids in your home? Did you know this per diem continues for most children even after they have been adopted? Did you know kids from foster care can go to any state college for free?

Did you know you can take your foster kids across state lines, enroll them in daycare and have babysitters?

Did you know you will get attached? 

And it will be hard?

It will. 

In the paraphrased words of Amy Monroe "You can handle getting attached and getting hurt. You're an adult. You can handle it. They are kids."

These kids you are afraid of loving too much - they are dying for someone to love them like that. While they are not dying from poverty, disease or hunger, their needs are the same.

If you'd like to learn more about adopting from foster care in KY visit the KY Department for Family Services. If you are interested in foster care or adoption in another state visit Focus on the Family.

My prayer is that this post would shine a light on the needs of children right "here". Please contact me if you have questions about our experience or if I can help you prayerfully begin the journey of foster care. lindsy.wallace AT gmail DOT com

broken system. sovereign God.

We officially have two FOSTER KIDS!

Never did I think I would be so excited and relieved to get kids into a broken system. God has confirmed we are on the path He has chosen for us and for these boys and while it is not the path we have chosen or expected, it is paved with His holy footprints having gone before us.

(If you're altogether confused about what and who I am talking about read here and here and here.)

I'll be honest, there are moments when I am frightened by the fact that the boys are in the custody of the state. That, while we can now take them to the doctor, enroll them in school and get them the counseling they need, we are still not "in control".

But then I remember, or someone lovingly reminds me, that we are never in control. Of anything. You'd think the past four years would have taught me that, huh?!

So here we are. In the midst of a broken situation inside a broken system. But the glorious thing about being here is that God has to work.

We can do nothing.

NOTHING.

God has to show up and He has to work.

He will either work through a broken system or He will work through broken people and breathe life into a broken family.

I don't know the Lord's ways. They are SO MUCH higher than my own.

I do know that He is able and I am trusting Him to be willing to work on behalf of these precious boys for their good and for His glory. The system may be broken but my God is sovereign.

“But God doesn't call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through.” ― Francis Chan, Crazy Love: Overwhelmed by a Relentless God